Sakura

2010-02-06T09:23:00.000-08:00

2010-01-06T09:11:00.001-08:00

Since when do you come around?
And the temperature's changed, nothing's the same
Left me, in yesterday;
You don't see me that way, touch me that way, no more..
When'd you get so cold, I'm not sure just
how much longer I can hold..

[Pre-Chorus]
You got me standing at the bottom of
this mountain that we've made
(mountain that we've made)
And the ground is shaking from all of our
mistakes (all of our mistakes)
But there's no one, nothing but us is in our way
it's a matter of time, we can rewind

[Chorus]
If you only knew,
What my heart goes through for you
I'm tryna break through,
don't you think it's worth the chance?
Let's leave the past, is that too much to ask?
And where do we stand? (Where do we stand?)

Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, oh, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche)
Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, yeah, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche, ooooh)

[Verse 2]
We see what's up ahead
Why do we stay?
Watching us fading
Trapped in by regret
there's no way out, and there's no way in, no
[ Find more Lyrics on http://mp3lyrics.org/GX4x ]
And it's so cold, I'm not sure just
how much longer I can hold

[Pre-Chorus]
You got me standing at the bottom of
this mountain that we've made
(mountain that we've made)
And the ground is shakin', from all of our
mistakes (all of our mistakes)
But there's no one, nothing but us is in our way
it's a matter of time, we can rewind

[Chorus]
If you only knew,
What my heart goes through for you
I'm tryna break through,
don't you think it's worth the chance?
Let's leave the past,
Is that too much to ask?
And where do we stand? (Where do we stand?)

Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, oh, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche)
Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, yeah, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche, ooooh)

[Brigde]
The bond is breaking and it's taking over
my spirit (quickly, quickly)
Something's shifted, have we drifted too far apart now?

[Chorus] If you, oh,
If you only knew,
What my heart goes through for you
I'm tryna break through,
don't you think it's worth the chance?
Let's leave the past,
Is that too much to ask?
And where do we stand? (Where do we stand?)

Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, oh, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche)
Can we pull through this avalanche?
(avalanche, avalanche, yeah, this
avalanche, avalanche, avalanche, ooooh) Avalanche
Lyrics: Avalanche, Marie Digby

2009-12-31T05:56:00.000-08:00

presenting something I havent done in a long time: decorating! =)
It feels so good to just have time to yourself to do this! Prints were sadly in black and white though. But it's still MY beautiful notebook! And I can write anything I want in it!
=)

Question is: What? LOLOL.=.=

2009-12-29T01:28:00.001-08:00

Yay! hahaha!

Quizzes Girls Games

2009-12-24T21:03:00.000-08:00

gravity pixie mp3 lyrics

free music downloads music videos pictures

Gravity (x6)

Stop pullin’ me

I know that you still haven’t found you

And when I wanna stand on my own two

Suddenly you start to show

Signs of what is possible

Then you’re back to your ways and I let me down

Tell me why I keep tryin’a stay around

When all my family

They always telling me, be

[Bridge]

Through with you

And I know that deep down I’m callin’ time

on you On you On you

[Chorus]

Every time I’m ready to leave

Always seem to be

Pullin’ in the wrong direction

Divin’ in with no protection

Man, you can’t keep steerin’ me wrong

Oh gravity

Pullin’ me back, pullin’ me in Why you

pullin’ me back, pullin’ me in

Just like gravity

Gravity (x5)

I know I betrayed but I’m made to

Ignore the universe when I see you

Cos every night the stars will shine

Merging into you turn signs

Anythin’ they can just to change my mind

When I pass your road I can’t help rewind

What is wrong with me?

All that I wanna be is

[Bridge]

[Chorus]

Stop pullin’ me

Gravity (x5)

Be quiet let me leave, let me go

Don’t say another word

Cos with every sound

You’re pullin’ me down Baby

You got a hold on me

Like gravity

Yeah Gravity

[Chorus]

Gravity yeah

2009-12-19T07:36:00.000-08:00

Hey. so here I am again, because this blog is more me than the other one. SO lately what's been happening? I've had 2 extra piercings on my right ear, got a badass skirt and top and trimmed my fringe and has signed up for 3 jobs so far. Gonna quit 2 soon and join a one with better pay.

Anyway I've been so guilty for not updating my stories... though I will once inspiration trikes me once again or I get frustrated at the lack of good stories online anymore. Haha.
Feeling rather emotionally exhausted because of some fuckng annoying idiotic loser who has too much time on his hands to not think about himself.

And the wheels have been turning in my head.

I've come (sadly) to a point of self-realization where that person probably never even liked me that way in the first place. But. The past is past.

And other reasons I'm feeling down?
1) I ALMOST got the Veronicas msn.
2) My mum is coming back on Monday.
3) I'm sleeping at my cousins tmrw and my mum is coming back on Monday.(NOOOO)
4) My mum is coming back on Monday.

Well, it's not my mum actually; its who she married-another psycho.

Yep. Fun life.
And I'm bored trying to go online and internet keeps failing on me. GRRRR. ARGHHH!

Can't wait for my results. (Snickers) Wonder what it'll be like.

Wonderful life. Really.

2009-12-15T05:54:00.000-08:00

gaga bad romance mp3 lyrics

Want your bad romance-

I want your ugly, I want your disease.

I want your everything as long as it's free.

I want your love. Love, love,love-

I want your love.

I want your drama, the touch of your head.

I want your leather studded kiss in the sand- I want your love...

Love, love,love- I want your love...

You know that I want you.

And you know that I need you.

I want your love and I want your revenge...You and me could write a bad romance.

I want your love and all your lover's revenge...You and me could write a bad romance.

Want your bad romance!

I want your horror, I want your design.

'Cause you're a criminal as long as you're mine-

I want your love. Love, love,love!

I want your love...

I want your psycho, your vertigo stick.

Want you in my rear window, baby you're sick-

I want your love.

Love, love,love! I want your love...

J veux ton amour. Et je veux ta revenge.

J veux ton amour, I don't wanna be friends!

You came, you had your fun and you left.

Still want your bad romance.

2009-12-01T02:48:00.000-08:00

Hey
so blogger is working again apparently
which is totally awesome.
Anyway I have a shout out to all my friends there who are discussing my love life, or lack of.
BUTT OUT. Nobody likes being judged when you guys ponder why I am not attached.
Because I'm 'crazy all the time'?
Because I'm volatile and 'intimidating'?
Because I'm not mature enough?
What is the definition of mature today?
a) Is it going through a lot of shit?
b) Knowing what to say at the right time and knowing how to act accordingly?
c) Basically just understanding?

Most of you guys may not know this, but I've gone through some serious purple shit. Shit which most of you have never experienced(and hopefully never will) before.

Yeah. PURPLE shit.
And no I don't intend to hook up with the next guy I meet.
Ew, such DESPERATION. And it takes me a longer time to trust people. Sure I joke around and converse like any other human does, but I ain't stupid. Stop insinuating that I am.
Because I am most definitely NOT.
And someday, I'm gonna publish a book and I will be a psychologist.
Former because I love doing it, latter because I want to help people.
Nobody ever asked me that huh?

I know nobody takes me seriously except for a rare few.
So I'm just gonna wait for a guy who dares to.

BUT

I'll do the STUPID dare first.

2009-06-19T02:43:00.000-07:00

heaven ayumi mp3 | lyrics

free music downloads | funny games | pictures

2009-06-03T01:40:00.000-07:00

I wish he did.

2009-05-27T07:24:00.000-07:00

Fighting emotions that stand taller than I

running away from the hurt avoiding the dreadful cry.

calling your name but you're nowhere to be found

scared, lost and alone...hurt bound.I loved you right...didn't I?

I loved you right...didn't I?

You laughed at me when I cried
I opened myself to you and you lied

you left me in a dreadful place
Never to return to this lonely and empty space

I need to get out I need to be free,
I need to run,
I need to laugh,
I need to love...!!

You can't hurt me no more I've come too far
I've won this battle,
this dilemma,
this war.

I no longer call out your name expecting you to find I'm no longer scared, lost, and alone....and hurtbound.

OMG phobos won first in cheerleading! I'm proud of'em. =)
I'm feeling very sucky when I got home. Mum was yelling for coming back late

JIAYOU PPL! STUDY TMLLLLLL!!! (studying tmr with yanti at tm library =) works so far!)
CIAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

2009-05-16T06:25:00.000-07:00

Any man can be a father. It takes someone special to be a dad.

I swear a jet is crashing through my mind.

2009-04-29T02:08:00.000-07:00

Quizzes Girls Games

Identify. Personify.
Incorporate. Eliminate.
-----------
I d e n t i f y
yourself by the
name that you bare.
----------
P e r s o n i f y
yourself in the
clothes that you wear.
--------
I n c o r p o r a t e
yourself into
all that you do.
-------
E l i m i n a t e
the negatives
that try to burden you.
-----------
Live. Learn.
Love. Earn.
-----------
L i v e
your life
the way that you chose.
---------
L e a r n
from your past
win or lose.
---------
L o v e
everything about
who you are.
-------------
E a r n
the world's respect
and success is never far.
-----------
Eight simple words
to guide you through your days
And if things ever get too tough
remember I love you always.

Statistics: Guy's basic viewpoint on life

2009-04-15T03:19:00.000-07:00

1) How do you try to understand a girl?
12.5% What she says.
50% Body language.
0% Facial Expression.
25% Tone of voice.
12.5% Others.

This is a rather obvious answer to some of us, but some guys did put other choices instead of body lang.

2) What are your priorities in life?
75% Family
12.5% Career
0% Social Life
12.5% Studies
0% Others

3) Which of this is most appealing to you?
0% getting a scholarship/ huge leadership post
62.5% closely knit family with stable income
0% wide circle of friends who love having you around
25% close stable relationship with 1-3 friends
12.5% travelling free
0% world peace
0% no school
0% getting the girl you want

4)What do you think is your weakness?
0% Lack of emotion
12.5% too much emotion
0% lack of intuition
50% non-committal attitude
12.5% maybe a little self centred
0% too many friends
0% too little friends
12.5% no idea
12.5% think too much

5) When do you plan to get married?
0% 20-23
75% 24-27
25% 28-31
0% 32-35
0% Later than 35
0% Never

6) What do you notice first about a girl?
20% eyes
0% nose
0% mouth
0% cheeks
10% smile
10% laughter
10% voice
10% body structure
0% hairstyle
0% skin colour
0% legs
30% face

2009-04-01T01:11:00.000-07:00

Hey. A lot of things have happened lately, I'm so lazy to type it all.

Musfirah's performance was spectacular! The ending was abit abrupt though. And Wida wants to 'know' Abang Dol.

Wida,wida...

Minah got interviewed on how she thought the show was. So cool, see yourself on tv!

But anyway, today is the first day of the month, and I'd like to discuss on something interesting. Due to the fact that I hardly blog about stuff, I am going to turn this blog into some sort of an online mag.

So the thing is, I am already doing this survey about the opposite male gender as a forfeit.

SO, with my brilliant (and not precise) analytical skills, I will collate all the statistics and tell you how a guy's world works. Of course it will not be soooo accurate, but it's gonna be interesting.

SO, you want answers, I got em, I can get em. Feel free to leave a taggy at the side for your ideas on what you wanna know about different groups in society.

2009-03-28T03:26:00.000-07:00

Quizzes Girls Games

Chocolate chips and lollipops and ice cream and the weather in my mind

2009-03-14T08:12:00.001-07:00

Quizzes Girls Games

2009-03-14T06:28:00.000-07:00

Dog Makes Friends With Duck @ Yahoo! Video

A Fine Frenzy
Almost Lover

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick
Well, I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images...
And when you left, you kissed my lips
You told me you would never, never forget
These images

No...

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just... fine.

Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life?

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should have known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do...

My eye infection is gone. I have normal eyes now.

Lately I've been dreaming. Different varieties everyday. But everything is about finishing the unfinished business.

This morning I told myself my life was in shambles.
This afternoon I felt so lifeless, like a shell of what I used to be.
I tried not to cry when I was alone waiting for someone at Dhoby Ghaut Mrt.
Why do we have emotion? When 3/4 of it kills us.
I will never regret the love for a mother and everyone else. But I shouldn't care about myself. It is logical. This way I wouldn't have to worry about getting hurt. Nothing touches me. I am safe in the tiny radius of my body, compact inside this shell.

I know there are other people out there who are feeling the same way, or worse.

Just remember and appreciate what you have.

I guess it is in these times when most people emerge stronger than before. But I think I'm part of the minority.

When I realised he was back together with her, I was so relieved, I didn't know there were tears in my eyes. I realised I became so vulnerable. I realised I loved him like a second father. I realised I needed him, because mum needed him, hence I need him to put this family together.

I was sobbing too much to reply to any of his words.

I feel sad for my friends who are suffering. Maybe there's a lesson you have to learn in enduring this problem.

Good luck to everyone for GP this Monday.

2009-02-18T04:36:00.001-08:00

This is my life; this is my first breaking point.

2009-02-15T05:18:00.000-08:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I believe there is an untold future blockbuster in our hands. You have heard of SuperMAN. You have heard of batman AND Robin. You have heard of 3 musketeers. You have seen the Fantstic FOUR.

But, L&Gs, have you heard...of the Fantastic FIVE?

I shall now tell you the famous story of the fantastic 5(complete with cameos from other classes)

(CHAPTER 1)
Once upon a time there was a group of superheroes called the Fantastic 5. It was an amazing group, comprising of 5 members.

It was Valentine's Day on that day, and they were very excited. Happily the popular 5 trotted up to the school gates of MJC-MahJong JC- expectantly. Just as they expected, hordes of girls and guys started to run to them.

"OMG! It's the Fantastic 5! OMGEEE!" Girls started squealing as they did a 100m dash towards the 2 guys of Fantastic 5, Chun Kiet and Ikhwan. Well actually, just Ikhwan. Chun Kiet scared them off with the blob of fire burning on his head- oh wait, that was his hair. (His special power,yep)

"Ikuan!Ikuan! Sign on my shirt! Sign on meee!" one girl yelled in his ear. Ikhwan shook his head no.

"Baa, I don't want to dirty it," he said. So the 3 girls dragged the 2 guys into the school before further chaos ensued, because they were late.

Once in the hallway, automatically they opened their lockers, and hundreds of love letters fell out. Jamie, of course, had the most. She giggled and a pink aura surrounded her, causing all the guys in the hallway to stop and stare at her, except those in F5.

Natasha scanned the pile of letter in front of her and in 0.95 milliseconds, found the letter she was looking for, and happily tore it open and read it. It was from 'Lift'.

It was from a LIFT.

Now, the last member had striking blond hairmand a very thin siamese cat by her side. Her name? Party. Paris+Yanti=Party.

She preferred a cat to a dog due to religious reasons. Anyway she was so excited by the letters, she was too busy swimming in them to notice that there was a weird-shaped letter stuck in her hair... It was black and it looked like a bomb.

It was a bomb.

Happily ticking away. In. Her. Hair. (5...4..3..2..1..)

"PARTY! RUN!" Jamie yelled, and everyone bolted out screaming.
Then it exploded and destroyed everything in its (radial) path. A letter came flying upwards and down into Party's hands.

Yes, she was alive still. Somehow she wasn't affected by the bomd and I don't even think she heard it or see it. You see, she had a special power.

Unlike the rest, her power was a disability. Yes, her disability- to sing. Because of it, her ears had gone partially deaf and this made her practically invincible.

TO BE CONTINUED!
Further cameo appearances of Malique, Zhong Ming, Joseph, Amirah, and much more!
TAAAG!!

2009-02-13T19:50:00.000-08:00

Hey! Azi here. So friendship day has passed, and the excitement is over, and I bet everyone is feeling EXHAUSTED. Especially those who had pe and cca on the same day, like me and nat, and the rest of mcs, and mirah, and the soccer people.

I had tuition yesterday and was drained by then. I didn't even manage to eat dinner, just plonked myself on the bed and *snooooze I already slept.

I had this wonderful encounter with this nice Chinese guy today this morning. I wanted to buy he sausage mcmuffin meal and realised the stupid promotion wasnt applicable for today. So there was I, embarrassed and alone, because I didn't have enough money because I topped up my card.

So I was debating whether to buy the milo or the burger, and suddenly a hand comes into my line of vision with a $2 in his hand. "If you don't mind," he told the cashier lady.

I almost practically melted on the spot. like WOW, that's totally unexpected. And amazing.

So the lady nodded, took the money from him, and gave me the change. "Pass the change to him," she whispered, and I did, smiling. Told him thanks so much and walked out happy with Milo+Burger in my hand.

Immediately I called Amirah and told her. I still couldn't believe it.

And I had Econs remedial today. I noticed my mortal didn't check the locker. Neither did anyone else.

And I haven't received anything from my angel. =(( Why oh why...

Anyway, my new year's resolution is decided.

1) to make my mum proud.

2) never give up.

3) to save more money.

TAGGY! ^.^

Btw I still love flamingos. Hehe.

2009-02-07T22:07:00.000-08:00

Heyyyy.
So anyway I realised I havent sufficiently blogged much.
Less interesting things first.
I love the book "If we kissed". Great story!
Am reading "Life As We Knew It" now. It's even MORE awesome. It's a normal night where everyone goes out to see an asteroid bump with the moon. Problem is, it doesn't bump. In fact, it was big, it crashed and practically threw the moon OFF course to come closer to Earth. So it's now big enough to fill the sky.

So what happens? The moon controls the tides, right?
TSUNAMIS.TORNADOES. Electricity satellite imaging internet telephone lines shuts down. And everything starts going downhill right from there. In the day, the moon can still be seen. Written in the diary of 16-year-old Miranda, she pens down her struggles she and her family faces, and how they can possibly face the end of the world together.

I actually planned to write a story like this. But I guess the idea's been taken. (I'm serious.)

So anyway, it's been quite an emotional rollercoaster week for me, and quite chaotic as I struggled to slide into JC2 mode.

And I haven't been complaining about this...
I was otw to whitesands with Tiq and Natasha in the bus 2 weeks ago. The bus was packed and I was trying very hard not to lose balance.
Then this WONDERFUL lady got up and wanted to move to the exit. "Excue me excuse me," she kept saying. So she tried to push her way through.
While she selflessly tried to get her way in the MOVING JERKING bus that HAVENT stopped yet, I got increasingly irritated. She was pushing me, and I was about to fall. Relaks ah beb. In fact, we 3 were getting down on her stop too.

THEN she made this 'tsk' sound, like I'm the one who did something inconsiderate, so I said loudly in an angry voice, "I'm getting down ALSO."

So when the bus stopped, she managed to push her way thru.
I yelled at her something like 'pig' in malay.

Like WTF right? Stupid bitch.

Anyway I had CIP ytdy. It was fun actually. Enjoyed it m'self. Nicholas the bully pinced my cheek (OW) and Malique had hordes of girls(small ones) chasing after him. "CARRY ME! CARRY ME!"

Then I discussed with them what to do about some stuff. And I realised some news that Yanti n Mirah didn't tell me, and cried abit.

In the end, I may not do it after all. Haixxx.

Anyway, don't forget to leave a taaaaaaaag. Whoever you are =)

2009-02-02T22:06:00.000-08:00

Hey. Havent updated in a looooooooooong time.
JC1s are here, clogging up the place with 100 extra then usual.
um, was a tiring week, emotionally, financially.

OH YES! I signed up for SALSA baby. I miss the 'normal' dances hee. Am glad I signed up for it.
Umm, I think I don't like pink birds anymore. Yepyep.
Am aiming for scholarship, but whatever. Don't think I will make it.

Jamie clap: WALAO!

Oh yeah! Today we went to Lt early again. I tested the mike. Maleg sed something r rated on mike. "mjsuc..ck"
Updated the AzTiqYa book.

Mr Ng clap: (deep voice imitation which is supposed to be oh so scaaary)

Yanti kept scribbling on my math notes. So I scribbled on her.

And uh, I hate Econs, cos I have to pay attn the WHOLE lesson. How bloody tiring is that? (slacker's new challenge)

Yanti clap: 1/0=undefined, unlimited frequency.

Beware of Yanti legs. Psycho AND freaky. HAHHAHAHA shes gonna kill me lawl.

Pink bird has flewn away.

Me is fluttering like a BoOtiPool butterfly(yeah rrright) =.=
Byebye. Chaochaociaociaoseowseowsiaosiao. TAGTAGATABGAGATAGATTAGGATAG.

2008-12-29T21:25:00.000-08:00

Hey.

I have not been updating, as you can see. I have the Phuket trip to talk about, my mum's wedding(she looks gorgeous than ever yesterday), the class bbq and I have the end yr chalet with my father and his friends later. OMG its gonna be sooo fun =D

Phuket:

got a lot of bapok

2 massages(I'm spoilt yes)

ONE MASSAGE BY A BAPOK(yes u read it)

Island hopping is beautiful

Boat ride with hot matsaleh guys(droooooool-.-)

Canoeist Musa is annoying("RRRrina!!"-.-)

Abi says I have abit of boyness in me(I climbed a lot of steep rocks-I should go hiking one day, itd be awesome)

Internet surfing for an hour at the hotel!

ABSOLUTE SEA PEARL HOTEL

Nice pancakes

HALAL KFC

swimming

Our room is haunted

'People' jumping above at night(superloud-cannot sleep)

Prayed and third day, jumping no more-PHEW

Jamban overflowed because of my SISTER's SHIT(AHHHHHHHH!!!!)

bought new cap

bought shoes

bought wedding rings

ladies there were gushing"OH! YOU GET MARRIED MONDAY! I WANT TO SEE!!"

one of them starts calling us darling because my mum kept calling abi darling(haha)

go home

home sweet home!

Class BBQ:

Joseph the (Malique:HORNYBASTARD!)
Chunkiet the ah beng
Ah Lian dunno how to wash things
Judy loves her corn
Mirah the wanderer and very caring friend(love you=))
Natasha the cook
Ikhwan the girl who cannot light matches(Curly long hair proves it all babeh)
Alvin the GUY who can light matches
Shaun the sweetie who brought extra stuff
Camilia the sexy who had to leave halfway
Malique the joker as usual
Syafiq reads porno with jamie O.O
Ken the one who doesnt know to cut the veggies first or wash it-.-
Jamie the OTHER sexy one who taught me how to float, along with ah lian.
Zhong Ming the loser ODAC who dunno how to light things=.=
Swimming and somersaluting in the water
Eating disgusting squid

Wedding:
My mum a gothic makeup do-over(she follows me it seems)
White gown
Tears of relief and letting go the long kept remorse
A new father that is my father but can never replace my original
A new brother who has gone throught the same shit I did
And...
The SAME OLD sister who is sooo bloody irritating and telling me to get off the com right now. =.=

BYE!

2008-12-13T06:05:00.000-08:00

Omg I haf to tell you a lot of things! First, bout Genting. I took everything scary, don't worry, they're not that scary EXCEPT for space shot. Then I will hafta talk bout tuition stuff, then I'm done. But first I will have to talk a bout a dear friend that I wanna clarify with others.

My dear TJC people, if you happen to pass by this blog, that's great.

I just want to say that yes, first impressions leave a deep mark on people. But give this girl a chance, yeah? Because she may not turn out to be who you expected her to be. She's a great friend that sticks out for people, NEVER betrays them, and yeah, a bit of a perfectionist. But if she has never hurt you in any way, then forget the first impression. Because she is not the kind to purposely hurt or do anything annoying, this comes from a person close to her. Give Syazwani some time and you'll see the other side of her when she warms up to you, please. =) She has stuck through hard times with me and defended me when I was down and misunderstood. I love her.

Okay, PHOOOOTOS!

Mr Bean with my uncannily alike sister. Hm...

Sibyl, Michelle and Anita

How they make tiny cute donuts!

Some camwhoring....=x

Bertram(sibyl:ber-ter-em) and his mum!

Sibyl the psycho and me. Wait, I'm psycho too...

I knew Micaela had the same genes as Mr Bean...

Nigel on a mighty horse.... which needs 50 cent to move.

Sibyl promoting donuts galore!!

Michelle,me,sibyl

Donuts again!

The ferris wheel in the mall...

Pretty boy and paedophile behind....

Okay I'm sooo tired I don't even feel like posting what happened. That said, I think I like geeks.... Go figure about what I wanted to talk about today in the first paragraph.

Now Sibyl has gotten me addicted to this Lady Gaga song:

=I'll follow you until you love me, Papa,paparazzi=

2008-12-06T07:25:00.000-08:00

OMG I have a gazillion stories to tell, but idk where to start.
Firstly, WHAT THE HELL? You guys can't do my quizzes?
T.T
Next: I went to a goat farm on Wednesday... It was really lovely. We wen to feed the 'bachelor' goats because the milking mothers were locked up.
After a while, I had the courage to feed them by hand. So I took a handful of leaves- it seems they like leaves more than their stems so i decided to help them by pouring them on my hand- and the mature goats are gentler than the babies, they lick your hand and they're so cute!

Then we went to a vegetable farm- nothing interesting. Anyway Thurs we headed for Desaru in Msia- Best part was the ostrich farm.

SOOOO cute and pretty eyes(llooooong eyelashes) but saw them bully a poor small partially blind one. Poor thing- got pecked at, pushed to the side and they actually started HISSING. Like the SSSSS with their mouths at him. Poor thing was squinting his way thru and probably didn't even know what hit him. =/

Fed them too, with my hands. Their beak is large but not sharp. I'd say the only idiotic animal you wudnt wanna feed is the chicken. The beak is DAMMMN sharp and I had some scratches.

Anyway On morning of Hari Raya Haji I am going Genting. =/ Fun I guess, but I'll miss my mum and the gathering. But I am staying over at my cuz's place for a week so I'll met em later!

Stomachache. Gah... I overate. I didn't want to disappoint my grandmother because she cooked so I ate some of her food, even though I was VERRRY full by the time I came back from ECP. NOw I feel like vomiting.

It sounds like I'm having fun, ne?
Well I just when cycling after receiving my madrasah results.(did okay) and when we were renting bikes, my step sis the clumsy idiot who refused to cycle but skate (her stand: she does not know how to cycle) FELL while going down the slope on the bike shop. Quite steep. SEE THIS is the problem why I don't want to skate. Anyway she just had scrapes on her elbows but what happened after that was scary. She suddenly turned faint and said she couldn't see, wasn't responding or hearing well.

I was like freaked out. And super scared for her. My father carried her to a seat and then she turned ok colour. HAha, Ok colour.

Niwae, both my sis are irritating me to get off the com. SHUT UP. one is asking me what blogger is the other is telling me what to type.

2008-12-03T05:28:00.000-08:00

The person who tagged you ?
Heyya The babidog! (O.O) Oink oink.

Your relationship with him/her ?
MCS member... a friend to go crazy with...HYAHYA

Your five impressions of him/her ?
Hm...Pretty, slow, easygoing, sweet, Hyperactive!

The most memorable thing she/he said to you ?
"AZRINAAAAAAAAA! I MISS YOU!!!"

If he/she become your enemy you will... ?
Be very very sad and torn...=(

What is it that you want to tell her ?
How much I really miss her lame moments and I stare at her like she's an idiot. Wait, she IS one. =DDD

Your overall impression of her/him ?
One word===Blonde.
XD

How do you think people around you feel about you ?
They think I think too much.

The character you love in yourself are ?
Able to make my loved ones happy...

The most ideal person you want to be with ?
Now this is a VERY complicated question. Because I'm in love with a 2D guy. Is that okay? (grins)(Questioner stares at me as if I am alien)

OK. NVM. On the contrary, the characters you hate about yourself ?
Everything except the above. XD Kidddinnnng. I think.

For the people that care and like you, say something to them.
You'll never walk alone. (BUT I SUPPORT CHELSEA OKAYYYYY)

Pass this quiz to the people you wish to know how they feel:
1.Amirah
2.Yanti
3.Natasha
4.Jamie
5.Jolene
6.Atiqah
7.SyazRedhead
8.Mainura
9.Sharifah
10.Khairiyah

If no.7 & 10 are together, will it be a good thing ?
Syaz and Khai? R U KIDDING ME? ITLL BE AWESOME!!(grins)

What is no.2 doing ?
Yanti? Dunno...she hasn't replied me at all...she can just rot in her own house.

When was the last time you chat with no.3 ?
Natasha...hm.. I msg her... Last time I called was about CIP... last Sunday.

What kind of music does no.8 like?
Mai? Uh...I don't even know if she listens to music! Lagu jiwang I guess...XD NYAHAHA

What is no.10 doing now ?
Khai is online.. She does a lot of things online...hmm I'm not sure..'-.-

Is no.7 sexiest person in the world ?
Syaz? HELL NO! I AM SEXY BABY!

Does no.1 have any pets ?
Amirah? Nah... But she loves cats like I do..
Are no.1 and 5 bestfriends ?
('-.-) Pls don't ask a stupid question. Not all my friends know each other. (Questioner:Ok ok) (looks apologectic)

What colour does no.4 like ?
Kecik eh...Hmm... She's a sporty one... I'm not sure... Must be all the weird colours-HehehXDD

Where does no.4 live ?
Jamie/kecik lives in hougang...

Have you tried developing feelings for no.8 ?
STOP ASKING ME STUPID QUESTIONS! *pong*bang*ting*
(Questioner:OKOK! I'll stop I'll stop!)

Talk about something for no.1.
You're right. Love sucks. =.= (questioner: oookaaay...)

Where is no.2 studying at ? MJC. She does go to Woodbridge hospital for some lessons though...

Does no.5 & 9 get along well ?
*sharpens knife* (questioner: OH GOD! OKOK I'LL STOP!)

What is no.10 hobby ?
Going out, Chatting, Blogging(sometimes)...Hmm... Other hobbies, not sure... I need to ask her...

What is no.5 surname ?
Tan Chu Ling Jolene. I don't know which is the surname HAHAHAHHAHAHAH

Is no.4 att/sgl ?
Single...So SHE'S IN FOR THE KILL GUYS!

Does no.6 have any siblings ?
Yes. One older bro and sis, which she often complains about.

HOI YOU PPL OUT THERE! I WROTE YOUR NAME, I 'TAGGED' YOU SO TRY THIS FRIGGIN QUIZ!

2008-11-26T03:05:00.000-08:00

Clarke Quay(or was it Boat Quay?)

2008-11-13T19:30:00.000-08:00

Hello. After viewing my old archives I have decided to do a poetic one for old times' sake.

How I am feeling now:

The light shines into the stillness of the room, its glow emanating heavenly warmth.
The light beckons me to move ahead and never look back.
Behind, I hear things that keep repeating itself like a musical box. Its heavy scent lingers in the air like a mysterious conundrum.

I utter a self-command to not let my thought linger around it.
My feet suddenly feels heavy.
I move faster. The solidness has worn out, and I am free again.

2008-11-12T21:23:00.001-08:00

Haha. True,true. ;D

In the case of a zombie invasion, Ima survivor!!

2008-11-09T06:10:00.000-08:00

Because I think my sister has done a great job, I'm posting this funny story here. Enjoy! It's when people start to sing lines to talk instead of just-well, talking.
So this story starts where they are having a tree-climbing lesson...

“Okay, today, we will start with tree climbing.” Iruka announced.
“BEGIN!” he left.
They started climbing trees. But then, something embarrassing happened to Sasuke.
Everybody started laughing. Sakura and Ino giggled.

HIS PANTS WERE DOWN!

Kiara sniggered. “I’M, TOO SEXY FOR MY PANTS...” she teased, holding up a pair of suspenders. “My- KIARA! YOU LITTLE!” Sasuke yelled, pulling up his pants.

“OH! THE 7 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU!” Sasuke sang. “YOU TEASE, YOU SNEEZE YOU STINK YOU SNORE, YOU FREAKY BOAR…YOU’RE FAT AND UH-UH- GLY!”

“so not!” Kiara shouted. “WHAT TIME IS IT? TIME FOR YOU DE GO, IT’S OUR VACATION!”

Just then, Iruka heard the noise and arrived. “Kiara, Sasuke! Stop this immediately! The Hokage is here! Apologize now!” he scolded.

“IT’S TOO LATE TO APOLOGISE, IT’S TOO LATE…” Kiara sang, ignoring Iruka and the 3rd Hokage. The Hokage stared at them.

“Change your ways! Now!” Iruka yelled even louder.

“THE WAY I ARE, THE WAY I ARE…” Sasuke sang.

“this is serious! No more fun!” Iruka shouted, frustrated.

“Ohhh, GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUH-UN! OOHH GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE…” Kiara sang.

“I’LL BUY YOU CANDY IF YOU STOOOP!” Iruka suggested.
“chea, right.” Kiara rolled her eyes. Suddenly, Sakura chimed in. “OOH, CANDYMAN, CANDYMAN…”

“We can make this work!” Iruka pointed out, anger boiling inside of him.

“WORK THIS OUT, WE’LL MAKE THINGS RIGHT, THE SUN WILL SHINE!” Naruto sang loudly.

Suddenly, the sky grew dark. Rain was pouring down. Iruka gathered several umbrellas. “Under these! You’ll catch a cold!”

“OH, UNDER MY UM-BER-ELLA, ELLA, ELLA…” Ino sang.
As Iruka couldn’t stop the commotion, he called for a guard to stop this, but they needed to stay at their post. “how about a strict man?! “

Suddenly, a shy voice sang out loudly, “GIMME GIMME GIMME A MAN AFTER MIDNIGHT…” Hinata!

...

Everyone looked at her, and gave her a standing ovation. Iruka didn’t know what in the world was going on. Everyone was going bonkers.

“I’ll buy you sweet honey,” Iruka suggested, realizing he was beaten at the game.

Then everyone sang, including the 3rd Hokage, “HONEY HONEY HOW HE THRILLS ME…” everyone stared at the 3rd Hokage. “What? I can’t have fun?”

Soon, everyone was singing songs.

2008-11-08T09:01:00.000-08:00

Hello people. Somehow I typed somthing in my recent post full of pics, butbut they disappeared..?!?! Anyway I went out with my father and family to Swensens to celebrate my sis bday. And QAH, the COFFIN is sooo anti climax. ut good story, but its NOT scary and NOT my type. I yawned like 6 times?
YAWWWWWn. HAHA.

2008-11-08T08:52:00.000-08:00

2008-11-05T22:01:00.000-08:00

heyyyy. Im not gonna update bout today just gonna upload couple of photos that came in late. Went raya-ing with Mai and Sha like 2 weeks ago =)

2008-11-05T06:09:00.000-08:00

MUST WATCH. HAHAHAH. My darling's girly scream. (Now you know why he can sing.) He's sensitive at the collar bone area.

now this one is kamenashi. In the same band. He fell OFF TEH STAGE WHILE DOING A BACKFLIP. Seems that when he fell, Jin cam running to him lik lightning... How sweet. =)

2008-11-05T01:51:00.000-08:00

I'm so... disappointed. The Veronicas new vid is reallyXinfinity skanky.
Well shud haf known... shud haf known. WELL! NO matter, I shall still support them with all my heart as they make GRRRRREAT music. Yesyes. Even if Jess is bi.(Lisa's my fav)

Anyway my presentation today went better. MUCHHH better. YOSH! FOR TMRW I shall willingly plunge myself into the unknown black pool of pw and live to tell the tale. Like uh.. others did '-.-

Heh. Anywayyyyyyyyyy I really wanna get the EHub job! ME WANT X2! And I have come to a conclusion about my feelings.

Like how I've lived my whole life and I'm sure others do as well,
Whatever makes my mum happy makes me happy. =) BUT if he is still a two-faced idiot I will castrate him and hang his balls at atree somewhere. I told my mum that already (when I was in a fiery state). So yes, I REST MY CASE. YOOOOOSSSHHH! Anyway yesterday I couldn't sleep again. Curse Hana Yori and all the shizz. I ended up watchingmy wife is a gangster 3. SHU QI! ZOMG DAMMMMNN FUNNY I TELL YA. worth watching when youre bored!

Niwae today Syafiq was acting like a Yanti clone. Suddenly the both of them gang up on me instead of monkey n me on Yeti.. Whaaaattt la. Just because I woke up late and came late doesnt mean he has to find a new ally. So now I call Yanti Original and Monkey Copy. Niceeee riiight... I knowwwww.

Tmrw after presentation (we are the LAST one) I will go (hayake!hayake!) buy my sis nyer present... I feel so guilty for not being able to get her today on her bday. Anyway I know she loves ARTBOX like me. and that she wants to become a writer LIKE ME. and she likes to draw LIKE ME. sigh... the things a younger sister does. oh well.

Anyway Im reading fanfiction now... I.... gotta ciao. Hasta La Vista babeh. Byebye.

2008-11-04T06:26:00.000-08:00

Okaeri. (Yawns) I'm sooooooo exhausted. Testerday I didn't even have time to practice my PW. I hardly had any today too. SHXTS. I had to help my mum on her own 'PW' yesterday, a 5 min 'inspiring' slide show until 12. I havent been sleeping well lately and it exhausted engines I didn't even know I had until I lost them.
In the morn had breakfast with Mirah. It was very nice to have her there after my meeting.
=D
Miss ya Mirah. You're such a sweet friend.

PW sucked. I came late being at the receiving end of a death glare from Nat-lol ('o.o) and um... my first presentation sucked, because three amigos/idiots were there. I can safely say that Zul IS NOT INTIMIDATING. I REPEAT, HE IS NOT. At least I will not admit that. GRRRRR damm him!! Haha.

Then after thatyanti and i signed up at escape KFC(depressing workplace) and EHub- the movie theatre.

WE SAW THIS SUPER cute/hot malay guy. Let's not talk about his body can? But his face is so pretty boy. (Universal cute, dont worry) And when i looked at him, he looked away quickly.

...You dont get that from a guy everyday. Usually they're so freekin smug. but he's the shy type i guess.

The manager talked to us. He said he hoped we'd work long term, then better. Hmm... maybe we should come back after As. IF we get the job, that is.
Yanti and me: Oh God. PLEASE LET US HAVE THE JOB SO WE CAN SEE HIM!!!!!!
hahaha. gila much.

and we saw NADIA TKGS and AISHA with her GUY. OOOH cool. and nadia looked good with this otr fren of hers... compatible looking. hmm... oh i saw my pri sch fren with them Najiy.

THEN, my mum wanted to go out to buy my sis's present. I HAD TO FOLLOW. So i memorised my lines at Sim Lim Sq when my mum was buying my TEN YR OLD sis her LAPTOP. YES.

Feelin down now. Cos in the morning at my meeting, I was forewarned about the marriage. Lo and behold, my mum announced it when i got back home from Escape. ha...ha.

Looks like I had suppressed my emotions after all..

//Because after that I did something irreversible and stupid again//

2008-10-30T07:19:00.000-07:00

Hey! This is one of hana kimi's funny moments, one of the many2. This is where a lie detector is created to watch the panty thief. HAHA lol. watch it.

2008-10-30T05:48:00.000-07:00

Hai. I just finished revamping my slides again.
Anyway now I have to split with monkey his proposal cos his is too long for him to handle.
So i can get tested on HIS proposal as well.
Bugger.

Anywayyy today Yan and I were on my way to my house (in case you didn't know, my house is like a meeting place for all my friends, because it's near the interchange so it's convenient) and she wanted to top up er card. I thought, seriously THOUGHT ok, that min top up is ten at the machine. to top up 5 have to go to counter.

SO sure of myself, Yanti bet with me that if she wins, I go out with this guy she's trying to matchmake me with. (dotdotdot=.= sigh)

Of course I lost. So now I have to go out with her and Hasbi and yeah. Him. WHOM I DONT KNOW. WTH riiiiightttttttttttttt.

And I have started to revise. My close shave with re-uh-tainment(?) has got me by the heart. And I had a tearful affair with my mum. Cos I have NEVER EVER scored well ever since PSLE. PSLE was the only time I made my mum proud-er.(she claims that watever i do, shes still proud of me)

And my will went downhill from there, when I was burdened with deep-rooted affairs of the heart. I lost the will to be my best and decided to just hide in the shadows.

ANYWAY< GUESS WHAT? Yanti's brain is sooo small that she starts calling all guys 'she' and girls 'he'.
(She called ikhwan she 3 times and alvin girl once. and some more today.. i cant rmb)
And today Cikgu Scary went up to me and said "Wah, shiok eh, main computer."
We were doing pw. Well, Yanti was, I was studying.
And Mr Choong scared me by staring over my shoulder and Ken and someone else I cant rmb...
...OH GOD... STML...(short term memory loss)

And I saw this ahem couple at simei today.
Overall, today was a calm day.
Feeling dizzy right now, because I havent eaten... since... 2?
siiigh.
Well, Im gonna watch hana yori dango or maybe if possible,sky of love! Im gonna try find it now.

JA NE! TSUKI DAYO OGURI SHUN! (yare yare...=.=)

2008-10-18T23:23:00.000-07:00

Hello darlings. Ive been dying to post this story. It's a songfic- based on the song from mamma mia! Does your mother know that you're out? Ah, THAT ONE. THIS IS SUPER good, it's not written by me. It's by kakashidiot.

Does Your Mother Know?
You’re so hot, teasing me

One of the few dance clubs of Konoha is open mainly for shinobi. And it was there, in the secretive shadows, that I first glimpsed your pink hair.
It was out of place.I did a double take and for the first time in my life I felt surprise (although my face still showed its casual passivity). Although how I remained passive as you swayed your lithe body to the pounding beat is beyond me.For once, when I saw you, I was speechless.A good thing I had my mask on.
So you’re blue, but I can’t take a chance on a chick like you
That’s something I couldn’t do
I didn’t want to admit it but I felt my stomach drop like a stone as I watched Izumo, Kotetsu and Genma sidle over. As the dirty-blonde quirked his senbon suggestively towards you, you just smiled back coyly – and I wanted to jump in between you and challenge the examiner to a duel.But you enjoyed his hands and his body against yours and I didn’t step in for fear that I would be caught up in that dance.After all, anything between us would be automatically… taboo. Right?So I sat and watched. And ached.

There’s that look in your eyes
I can read in your face that your feelings are driving you wild

I watched the lift of your short black skirt as you twisted under the strobe lights. Mesmerized, I watched his fingers slid up your waist, lifting your short, tight shirt (some sort of tank top) past the pale skin of your ribcage.Your eyes are shut in ecstasy and when you open them, the music is in your green liquid pools and you seem to be like a wild thing – some part of nature that bonded with man.No. That’s just me being fanciful.

Ah, but girl, you’re only a child

And the look of beckoning you gave me is the stuff of fantasy. Or not. For some reason, you had found me. Picked me out of the many other people there – saw me as I sat back in the shadows. Your hands are in mine, pulling me to the lights and although I’ve watched for years, my feet are rather unsure.Not that I’d admit it.

Well, I can dance with you honey
If you think it’s funny
Does your mother know that you’re out?

“So….” I say, trying not to sound like your father. “Your mom – dad – know you’re out?”You pout and sway ever so close to me.“What kind of question is that?” you ask.“I’m concerned.” I find myself saying rather stiffly.But already your hands are running down my vest, unzipping my jacket.“I’m of age,” you say. “As of today.”“You’re what? Fourteen?”“Sixteen.”“Sixteen? Aren’t you supposed to be eighteen to get in here?”“I’m a kunoichi of Konoha. If I can’t fake my way into any old club, I don’t know what I’ve been doing during the whole of my life.”I blink.What the heck…..I feel slightly panicked.“Umm…. What’re you doing?” I ask. The jacket has been whipped off and thrown randomly away. It disappears into a corner.I don’t want to lose you but I do want to know what the fate of my flak jacket is going to be. I turn.Your body presses up to my back, your arms winding around my chest.You HAVE grown. I can feel it against my back.

And I can chat with you baby
Flirt a little maybe
Does your mother know that you’re out?

So with a sigh, I turn around and look you in the eye and force a casual smile. You pull yourself closer in response. Little minx.“Any closer and we might never get apart,” I murmur, your hair is right under my nose and I’m going to faint from the intoxicating jasmine scent of it.It relaxes me with its familiarity.It smells like Pakkun.“Is that a bad thing?” you ask.I don’t answer.“A penny for your thoughts.”I grin. “I don’t answer those offers – they always end up being very personal and uncomfortable.”“Try me. We’re so close anyway.”I look down at my feet, which have stopped shuffling around.“Hmmmm….. how should I say this???” I put on my ‘deep thought’ expression, closing my eyes, head tilted back and a hand on my chin. “You smell like my dog.”You look miffed.“Don’t say anything more,” You growl. But there is a twinkle in your eye.“It’s nice….” I hurry on to say. “It makes me feel relaxed.”“Heh. So I’m just a pup to you, eh?” you say with a sultry smile.“Well….” I laugh, sweat-dropping.You smack me playful and squeeze my butt.I yelp.“Did Pakkun ever do that?” you ask, flirtatious.

Take it easy
Better slow down girl
That’s no way to go
Does your mother know?

Take it easy
Try to cool it girl
Take it nice and slow
Does your mother know?

Your hands are on my butt.What the hell?What the hell am I to do? As I turn around, I catch sight of Genma, his senbon quirking madly as he sizes up the situation. He winks one brown eye and gives me a thumbs-up. Once again, I’m thankful for my mask as I slowly feel as if I’m about to combust. My face I am sure is as red as a tomato. And the only thing keeping my hands from visibly shaking is the fact that they are gripping the slim waist of a girl FOURTEEN years my junior and my student to boot.Am I pedophile?My head feels like it is buzzing.Already I can see people’s reactions in my head.Tsunade: What the hell, Kakashi? As if your perverted porn reading is enough you have to go hit on a girl more than a decade younger than you! That’s it! Team 7 is officially disbanded!

Gai: Kakashi! What the heck do you think you are doing destroying a girl who is in the spring time of her youth? Youth is a time for mistakes – don’t become one of hers!
Genma: Heh heh heh! So? Was it a five star or not worth the fuss?
Naruto: Kaka-sensei! I challenge you to a duel for taking away Sakura-chan’s virtue! Ero-sensei!!!!!!

“Is…. Um….. Naruto here?” I try to say in a smooth calm voice as your hands remain firmly on my ass.“Somewhere around with Sasuke,” you shrug indifferently.Suddenly it is imperative that we separate. There is no way I’m about to let myself become entangled in another desperate love triangle.Love…. That is dangerous in and of itself.“Umm…. Your hands are… on my butt.” I peek down at your pink hair. Green eyes are raised to me – and a pair of glossy lips in a little girl pout.“You don’t like that?”“Ahhhahaha!!!!” I laugh nervously. “Is that a question I have to answer?”“Yep!”

I can see what you want
But you seem pretty young to be searching for that kind of fun

“Ehhh….. well…. Don’t you think you’re kind of young for this?” I ask. “When I was your age….”I pause.“Yes?” you ask, curiously.When I was your age, I was in ANBU killing people with the chidori and living day to day in the mouth of death.No.When I was your age, the only relationships I indulged in was a whore every couple of months or the comfort of my dogs.Not good.When I was your age, I didn’t really have the time or inclination to fall in love – in fact, I still am not quite sure if it is worth it…. I guess that shows my inexperience right away….No.So maybe I’m not the one“Well?” You prod me in the ribs – ah! Goal accomplished. Hands off butt. We are standing in the middle of the dance floor.“Well…..”“When you were my age – what?”I’m at a loss.“Be honest,” you say, solemnly, seeing my dilemma. “I don’t know what you’re playing at – but when I was your age, that was the furthest thing from my mind. So –“I’m confused.No. I can’t admit that.You blink. Unsure.I try to calm down my racing heart and clear my suddenly tight throat.
“What I mean is – don’t you think you should slow down? Why rush all these grownup feelings? Aren’t you going to wait and take it slow? What about Sasuke-kun? What kind of message are you giving your teammates when you – uh – what do you call it? – grope – me up on the dance floor?”
Then you smile, a sweet innocent smile that starts in your eyes.

Now you’re so cute, I like your style
And I know what you mean when you give me a flash of that smile
But girl you’re only a child

“That’s a lot of questions, sensei. It seems to me like you’ve been stewing over this for quite a while. Been on your mind a lot lately?”I try to outstare you but end up glaring at my feet.Damn Tsunade’s teaching.You shrug, and wrapping your arms around my neck (it’s still a stretch, but you make it), you place your cheek against my chest and inhale my scent. You start to sway. And I can’t but help be swept away by the soft music.“I used to worry a lot about the future – that’s why I would make plans and decide to do things slowly. But after the war, I realized that life is too short to worry over. Shikamaru is right, you know. It’s too troublesome. You just gotta enjoy life as it passes by. Taking the good with the bad. Since our dancing doesn’t feel wrong, I’m taking the good as much as I can. Because one day, you’re going to die – in your bed or out on the field somewhere – and I don’t want to have to stand by your grave ‘what if’-ing.”“Ahhh….”I look down and we bump noses. Your green eyes look into my eye earnestly.“Sasuke-kun will never like me. I realize that now. And Naruto has another path to tread – I don’t want to pull him down. Plus… have you seen the way Hinata looks at him?”I blink.“She’s liked him since forever, right?” I said, remembering the first Chuunin exam I had nominated them for. Hinata had given him a small vial of medicine.Her first step.You nod.“I wish them all well. But when I think of me…. I want to enjoy myself. They should have no say about what I’m doing with my private life.”

Well I can dance with you honey
If you think it’s funny
Does your mother know that you’re out?

And I can chat with you baby
Flirt a little maybe
Does your mother know that you’re out?

“I see….”I don’t really but I go along with the moment because I decide to try out your philosophy.“And your parents?”“What’s with you worrying about my parents? You’ve got some fixation.”“Well…. Someone has to think maturely. What if your dad caught me and you groping each other up on a dance floor – what would happen then?”You lean back and close your eyes.I ravish your neck with my eye – each inch, I mentally kiss slowly and claim as mine.
Then I realize that you have been peeking at me underneath your sinfully long eyelashes.
I blush.
Suddenly your lips are pressed against my cloth covered ones and your hands are playing in my wild grey hair.
My hitae ate disappears.

Take it easy
Better slow down girl
That’s no way to go
Does your mother know?

Your hands are up my shirt and skirting the edge of my pants – my movements mirroring your every touch.
Blame it on my Sharingan.
When we bump up against a couch in a shadowy corner, part of me heats up another notch and although bells are ringing – sheissoyoungandyourstudent, thisisprobablyherfirsttime,whatwilleverybodysay – I know that a line has been crossed and the plow set on its course.And we both are not the type to look back once a decision is made.Take it easy

Try to cool it girl
Take it nice and slow
Does your mother know?

And damn her parents.And Tsunade.And anybody else.No.
Those evaporate from my brain as I touch your electric hair, kiss your eyelids shut and taste the scent of your neck and sake on your tongue.

Well I can dance with you honey
If you think it’s funny
Does your mother know that you’re out?

Your small hands run up my thighs, over my butt and pull me down closer to you as I straddle you gentle on the couch, pinning you down – as we make a blazing fire between us.
Your hands are up my shirt, teasing my nipples and then back down.
I don’t really think you know what you’re doing but that’s fine by me.
I don’t really know what I’m doing either.
Kisses and touch are all that’s needed.
And isn’t this supposed to be primal and instinctual?
The moon rises and falls, the night passes by.
People leave, people pass out and we, satiated, rest in each other’s arms and watch the stars swing overhead.
And we talk about everything under the sun and the moon.

And I can chat with you baby
Flirt a little maybe

We have gotten where we are – grasped the good in life regardless of what people said and we are happy.
The moon rises and falls still upon us.
People have left, people have passed and we still rest in the peace of each other.

Does your mother know that you’re out?

Damn right she does.
She came to the wedding.

2008-10-16T07:42:00.000-07:00

He came to my wedding.

He just sat there, watching me watch him. He knew I was always looking, and I knew he was too.

He didn't even say a word.
And it started that way, and progressed that way, until the end.
He just went up to me, and said three simple words that made a dangerous attempt to sway my heart again.
You look beautiful, he tells me.

I thanked him and turned away.
And turned back. Are you happy? I ask.

He blinks. Why? As long as you are.

Silence.

Are you...happy? He asks me.

If you are.

...Michael's a good man.

He is.

So you must be happy.

...

TBC

2008-10-14T08:19:00.000-07:00

Tired.
Just very emotionally exhausted.

2008-10-10T22:56:00.000-07:00

<
Broken Inside>>

Hello. I'm using my aunt's coma nd guess what?
I have a LOT of unfinished stories here.
One is finished though and it's a very short one. =D Yaya for you who don't like loooong ones.
It was 'supposedly' submitted to teh Commonwealth competition. But I handed in a little too late, so I dunno if they did submit. I think not. =CCC

Anyway it's like a Morrison story.. if that IS his name. the guy who inspires people. It's a shorter version, and of course more juvenile.

Enjoy ;D

The Bargain
Jim Matthews was dreaming. In the dream, he held the world in his hands. He dreamt that he started up a business and had his Masters done. He dreamt he became rich, bought a new house, married a wonderful woman, had two lovely children, grew old, and died happy and contented. Even in his dreams, Jim knew this could never be possible.
For two weeks ago, he went to receive his test results, a test that scanned for abnormal cells that proved him positive.
In addition to that two weeks ago, Jim realized he only had half a year to live.
After two weeks, he still couldn’t get it all in.

Jim Matthews got up from the bed, feeling a little dizzy. His short breaths weren’t helping him at all.
“If only- if only- if only,” he kept murmuring to himself in short tiresome breaths. If only he had time on his side. If only time didn’t seem to matter at all.
He didn’t feel like working today. Not now, not ever. Nothing mattered to him anymore.
“I’m so sorry, Jim. The test results proved positive,” Dr Will had said in his office, his hands covering his face.
Jim couldn’t move. He couldn’t think. For a couple of minutes he just looked down, unable to decipher the words coming out of his doctor’s mouth. Then he thought to himself, with a final wave of goodbye to his doctor, “It’s over. My life is over.”
Jim still remembered the day he broke the news to his family, which was, ironically, solemn, despite the fact that it was Momma’s birthday.
“I have cancer,” he announced quietly right after his mother was about to feed him a piece of cake. The hall was deathly silent. Everyone was genuinely shocked. Some, including his mother, just sat down on their chairs, staring into space.
How could someone like him encounter such a problem? Someone from such a respectable family with strong roots and values that were upholded throughout the generation. After that, Jim didn’t utter another word to them. He just couldn’t. Straightaway he left the house, leaving its occupants in such disarray that they actually forgot their initial intention of visiting. He went to the store, bought three bottles of beer and swallowed his sorrows the whole night. The following nights ended the same way.
His relatives and friends kept calling, but he never called back. Many tried to visit, but he never opened the door to anyone. Not even his mother could persuade him to talk. All he could think of was that his life is over. He was going to die, very, very soon. Sometimes Jim would stand in the kitchen, holding a knife, thinking to himself. “End it now. It’s better than suffering until the end.” But his fear of the unknown stopped him from doing it. Jim ended up doing nothing, thinking only of death and how cruel life was to him.
It was better not to have lived at all if it had to end this way. “What was the use of life,” Jim thought unhappily, “when everyone is going to die anyway?” Jim became lost in his own world, his entire mind in utter chaos. However, things changed when one night, he went out to buy beer yet again. This time he found his neighbour outside at his own garden, hugging his nine-year-old daughter, tightly, gazing at the stars. The pretty nine-year-old was just looking up intently at the iridescent stars, as if waiting to see something special. Her eyes glowed mysteriously in the moonlight, and her lips curved into a smile.
“Daddy is there anything you wish me to tell Mommy when I go?” the girl whispered suddenly. Her father smiled, a little sadly, when he said, “Tell her I love her, and I love you too, darling.” And they just gazed at the stars, the cool wind whipping the small girl’s hair across her face.
The following day Jim found out Jamie was dying. Her muscles were deteriorating. She could hardly move by herself. “The poor nine-year-old,” Jim would hear some say. And he would remember her, her smoldering gaze and starry eyes and her warm innocent smile. To Jim, to know that you were going to die was like dying a slow, painful death. Yet when he saw her out in the yard, playing, she was smiling all the time, happy and contented. She wasn’t moping around all day; unlike Jim, she was using up every last minute of her life to be happy, so she could leave filled with sweet, golden memories. To Jim, it was sad seeing her like that. He decided to visit her one night, and unknowingly he was actually visiting her on the night of her passing.

Jim had sat at the edge of her bed. They eyes met for a while, then Jim had said “I’m going too.” Jamie suddenly frowned, and then she said “So why are you here?”

Jim couldn’t understand her question. “What do you mean?” he asked, puzzled.

And Jamie had said her last wisest words of her life. “You’re still breathing, you know. Go tell your mother that you love her before it’s too late.”
And that was when Jim realized how foolish he was to think that his life was over. He had wasted so much time doing nothing.
Life is like a bargain made between God and his people. People are given a chance to live, experience, and feel in life. That’s what life is about. And in life, it is about moving on, overcoming challenges, and learning from mistakes to make people better, and learning the art of love. People live and die, and even in death, people learn that it is just another obstacle to overcome.
In life, there is death, and in death, life. It didn’t matter when and how they die; what mattered was how and when they actually start living their life. People don’t live twice, so they have to make the best of what they have of this period of time.

Jim was on his bed, thinking. He thought and thought. What was he going to do with the rest of his life? What could he do with it?

“I could do so many things,” he murmured, “So many.” That day, he called up his family members and friends for a meeting at his house. He told them how much he appreciated them and how each of them had made an impact in his life. He enthused about his love for his family, his mother, his late father, and his siblings.
“Whenever the time of my leave, I will leave this place with good memories, filled with love and happiness,” he said.
Jim Matthews went back to work. He lived like he never lived before, and lived his life to the fullest. He visited his mother everyday without fail.
In a couple of months, doctors had to amputate his left leg. Jim still kept on living. When he started sitting on a wheelchair, he was happy.
In three months, he had to resort to staying in the hospital. Everyone he knew was by his side. He was still happy.
When Jim Matthews died, he died never feeling happier in his life.

END
Liked that? Comment please. Anyway the next one is uh, about anime. AND IT INCLUDES ME YANTI and SYAZ as the main characs. Did it after O's, I should think. LOL.

It was a quiet day. So far nothing interesting happened. Only a couple of laughs had here and there, but mainly teaching. What the hell! Prelims are over! Can’t they give us a break?? Azrina thought to herself. She had shut off from reality. Thoughts of going home, reading manga with the book in one hand and a cup of hot milo in the other filled her mind. A smile formed on her face as she remembered the newly-bought Vampire Knight Book 6 was sitting still in her bag. She sighed and placed her hand on her chin.
Somehow her teacher seemed to notice her smile and her dreamy face. The teacher stared, annoyed, and said, “Yes Azrina? Got something to share with us?”
The brown haired girl snapped back to reality. She shook her head jerkily.
Oh boy. Can’t wait for this nightmare to end.

The black haired girl’s brown eyes were on her book, as if mesmerized with its words. She was studying intently a graph calculating lag time. Suddenly a hand came out from nowhere and smacked her book. She yelped and turned. “AZRINA! I was studying!”
The short-haired girl crinkled her nose in disgust. “Geography. What a stupid subject. Syaz.. you’re always studying. You need to learn to relax.”
“You on the other hand need to stop relaxing. Os are near!” she said indignantly.
“Yeah whatever.” Azrina sat on a chair beside her and started picking at her geography book. “Say, this Saturday, want to have a Fushigi Yugi marathon? You need a break anyway.”
Syazwani tapped the table with her pen thoughtfully. “Maybe… let’s get the others to come.”

So it was set. Azrina was to provide the cds. As expected she rented at the last minute. On Friday night, she remembered what she was supposed to do and hurried downstairs. She cursed inwardly at not having rented earlier. She doubted if the video rental shop below her flat was still open. Saturday was going to be a public holiday; Teacher’s Day.
It was ten plus. Few people were at s11. She rushed up the escalator and turned to the left to look at the shop.
Her heart dropped. It wasn’t open. Guess she had to call the gathering off. She wondered at how she would deliver this news to them at the least minute.
She looked at the shop again, and almost yelped in surprise.
It was open. And it wasn’t the same video rental shop; it was a different one. The rose, it was called. A weird-looking bespectacled lady was at the counter. She looked like she was dressed for a cosplay exhibition; she was a cross between Witchhunter Robin and Hell Girl.
Azrina assumed that she was hallucinating the first time she looked at the shop. She went over to the counter to the lady, who had such an unnerving stare that her palms started to sweat. Azrina felt weird. She felt that something was going to happen. Something major.
“What do you want, little lady?” the petite lady asked her.
Azrina cleared her throat. “Fushigi Yugi?” she asked.
The lady reached for under the table and emerged with a weird cd case. It had the picture of a rose as its cover. “I’m not sure what season this is,” I said.
“Anything.”
“What?”
“It is anything.”
“What season?”
“Well, guess you’ll have to find out what you want, don’t you?” She whispered, sending chills up her spine, “It can be anything you want.”
Azrina took a step back. She was careful.
“How much is it?”
“What?”
“What is the cost?”
“Whatever you wish and make of your decisions.” She smiled the widest creepiest smile Azrina had ever seen.
Silence. Then… “I have to go now. “
“Go where? Who will take care of your shop?”
“I don’t need to.”
Azrina felt a presence behind her and turned. No one.
When she turned back, the shop wasn’t there either. She dropped the cd case she was holding. Resting on the cold hard floor, the picture of the rose shimmered and glowed a deep dark red.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Syazwani asked. She was irritated. How could she rent a cd and not know the season?
Furthermore Azrina was acting weird. She was awfully quiet. Huda was propped on a chair resting. They were in Huda’s house. The four of them- Az, Syaz, Huda, Yanti and Atiqah. Fezra, being herself, did not come for the marathon. She hated animes.
Atiqah suddenly got up. “Toilet,” she mumbled and went off. Huda trailed after her, saying she needed to make some more coffee.
Yanti was humming to herself as she took out the cd from the cd case. Her short hair was tied into a tiny ponytail. She spun the cd on her hand as she studied it. The cd was emerald in colour, and thre were no designs for it. “Azrina froze as she watched Yanti place the cd into the player and slapped the button PLAY.
A lot of things happened at once. The tv flashed white, a voice came from the tv. It said, “Welcome to your destiny. We have been waiting.“
*

Azrina woke up with a violent jerk and realized she was in a different place. Suddenly she became aware of the group surrounding her. Right in front of her there was a beautiful woman. She smiled warmly as she looked at her.
Somehow she had a feeling they weren’t having any evil intentions. She didn’t struggle as two of her guards helped her up. Then suddenly she found Syaz and Yanti curled up in a corner. She ran to them and woke them up.
Syaz woke up and rubbed her eyes. She felt groggy and unable to move. Only then did she realize that she was in a state of shock. She calmed herself and sat upwards slowly, looking around. “Az… where are we?”
“Conan.” She turned behind and found a pretty woman answering her question and some people who seemed to be her guards. She looked at Yanti, who seemed unable to tear her eyes away from the beautiful lady.

“NO. SHUT UP!” Azrina’s mouth was wide open. Her head seemed to be working well now. Her hand seemed to tremble uncontrollably as she spoke these words. “Emperor… Hotohori?”
He nodded solemnly. “It is unclear where you come from and how you have come to know my name, but it is said in the scroll not to question or doubt you guardians, for fear of manupilating the threads of time, and destiny will change.”

Yanti stared at him. She still couldn’t get past her first discovery. “You’re a MAN?”
*

“So we are here to protect the fate of the Suzaku warriors and its priestess?” Syazwani asked for the 32nd time. Hotohori nodded. However, I have yet to find them all. I have a ceremony tomorrow at a village nearby. I need you to help me look out for people with-“
“Signs on their foreheads, arms, et cetera. We know.” Syazwani slapped Azrina on the arm the second she spoke it out.
“Don’t worry. We will find one or two of them by tomorrow,” Syaz reassured him. She noticed that he looked worried and there was a lot on his mind. “Leave it to us, Emperor Hotohori.”
Her words seem to comfort him. He smiled slightly. “Thank you very much. I suggest you sleep early tonight as the ceremony is tomorrow morning. I should rest too. You especially,” his words were directed at her as he looked at her with his fierce blue eyes. “You almost fainted just now.”
Yanti and Azrina saw their friend blush. They looked at each other.
Hmmmmmm…

*

“What a nice dress,” Azrina commented as she studied her dark brown feet-length dress. It was simple with a sash tied to the middle of her waist with the ribbon at the back. “I finally look slender!”
Yanti looked at herself in the long mirror. She looked great in royal purple. She studied her headdress that came with it. It was like a tiara except that she had to wear it like a headband. Small, sparkling red jewels glittered as the sun’s rays land on it. She wondered what the other Fushigi Yugi characters are like. Syazwani and Azrina had told her of their characters and habits, and how it will all turn out to be. “Nevertheless I suspect things won’t go exactly the same way as it did in the manga,” Syazwani had analysed last night.
As for Syazwani, she was still in her own room, getting ready. She wore a raven black dress. It was long sleeve, yet awfully light and cool. “It was made this way,” the emperor had said. “There is a small amount of highly-respected people who possess unhumanly powers, such as magic. Some make use of it for good, some for evil.”

She twirled around. Her dress didn’t get in the way.
“You look beautiful.” She turned around to see Hotohori looking at her with his unreadable eyes. Once again she blushed.
“Thank you, Emperor.”
“Promise me one thing.”
“Yes, Emperor?”
“Don’t call me Emperor. Call me… Hotohori.”

*
The ceremony had started. “Please guys. Whatever you do, don’t interfere. Tamahome and Miaka will come to us.” Azrina remembered what she had said to Syaz and Yanti. She fidgeted nervously while walking around the streets, waiting for the incident to happen. Soon, she told herself, soon.
*

It happened. They were now back at the palace. The two of them were imprisoned in a chamber near one of the emperor’s gardens.
Emperor Hotohori was sitting down. His forehead creased into a line as he pondered over the three girls’ suggestions that they were the ones they were looking for. Finally he spoke, “It is evident that the boy is a warrior. But is the girl really a priestess of Suzaku? What do you propose then?”
Yanti’s lips parted into a smile. “We talk.”

<
Will it ever change>>

2008-10-10T07:07:00.000-07:00

Hello there.

I am belly tired today. watched Mama Mia with my mum. Was ok, but some of the singing was awkward and unnatural. But the director made it a movie worth my time, although there were some parts that could be improved.

It's Syaz's birthday today.

HAPPY BDAY REDHEAD! I <3 u so much I'm so sorry if I didn't wish you properly I guess I was thinking about other stuff. =/ Sorry.

Anyway I'm tired. I can't find the Mandy Moore movie Centre Staged! I WANNA WATCH but its not there. Damn.

Anyway, I wanna watch one missed call (part one) WITH SUBTITLES. I am tired of watching it w/o.

And if D GRAY MAN REALLY finish, WAS SABEH la those idiots who decided to stop it altogether. (WASABI)

sigh. cya.

2008-10-09T06:54:00.000-07:00

Ok. On to nicer stuff.

Yest yest me Yan Nat Amirah (b4 buying Syafiq nyer present) watched this horror movie I ALWAYS FORCE MY CLOSE FRENS TO WATCH. (yes its compulsory if you want to be on the best friend list) and Amirah the smart ass wanted me to

Amirah: EH AZ, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS UH THEN NICER!
MAKE IT DArKER !
....

Let's see what happened. Let's look at an excerpt from Amirah's post.

First: Thinking the lift has installed music.
(But it's Nat's phone.)

Second: Screaming like apocalypse has come when an old man passed by ever so slowly by my window. (hes my neighbour. =.=)

Third: I had to send her down.

Four: She actually yelped when the lift door opened.

"Okay fine. Haha. Nat is making fun of me on her blog. Takpe takpe. I will graciously admit my mistakes. The lift at Azi's place does NOT have music. It was just Nat's phone ringing. (lame i know) And the man outside Azi's window was NOT a ghost. He was just an old man reading the newspaper. ( rite) Haha. I screamed like hell lah..buat malu je. It wasn't my fault seh..he was creepy. Haha..no thanks to the horror movie we were watching. "

Anyway. Just a share of loserishness others do. NOT ME. (HEHE)

2008-10-09T05:46:00.000-07:00

Ah.
My mum's marriage is over. Again.
I don't really care this time round.

I thought I didn't.

Until my younger sis called me crying hysterically, asking me why this is happening.
It tore me apart. Tore my heart to shreds when she couldn't even talk properly!
Why? WHose fault is this that could make her heart break twice at the hope of ever achieving a proper family again?

She's so young!

Don't ever let her be like me. Don't!
Oh god.

Those raising voices

Were like memories of a distant past that I don't ever want to remember having gone through.

My uncles came over to talk to my mother to coax him to continue the wedding.
But he has already made up his mind. It seems he has informed his guests.
My uncle was informed of my results by my cuz.
He told me not to do anything rash, and remember I am still a Muslim.

I swear to God, cutting myself, or committing suicide had not ever CROSSED my mind since the change.

I feel really shitty right now. So please leave a tag even if you're a stranger, with or without your name... =)

2008-10-09T05:07:00.000-07:00

There's a little creepy house
In a little creepy place
Little creepy town
In a little creepy world
Little creepy girl
With her little creepy face
Saying funny things that you have never heard
Do you know what it's all about
Are you brave enough to figure out
Know that you could set your world on fire
If you are strong enough to leave your doubts
Feel it
Breathe it
Believe it
And you'll be walking on air
Go try
Go fly
So high
And you'll be walking on air
You feel thisunless you kill this
Go onAnd you're forgiven
I knew thatI could feel thatI feel likeI am walking on air
She has a little creepy cat
And a little creepy bat
Little rocking chair and an old blue hat
That little creepy girl
Oh she loves to sing
She has a little gift
An amazing thing
With her little funny eyes of hazel
With her little funny old blue hat
She will go and set the world on fire
No one ever thought she could do that
Feel it
Breathe it
Believe it
And you'll be walking on air
Go try
Go fly
So high
And you'll be walking on air
You feel thisunless you kill this
Go on
And you're forgiven
I knew thatI could feel that
I feel likeI am walking on air
Flitter upand
Hover down
Be all around
Be all around
You know that I love you, go on...
Feel it
Breathe it
Believe it
And you'll be walking on air
Go try
Go fly
So high
And you'll be walking on air
You feel thisunless you kill this
Go on
And you're forgiven
I knew thatI could feel that
I feel likeI am walking on air
I am walking on air...

2008-10-08T08:41:00.000-07:00

I think kan

I retain tau.

Especially if

I fail Math.

Tadi kan

'Nangis' 'bangat' di KFC

Idiots Mats ajak makan

I want to kill them and eat THEM instead.

I think kan

this guy is a heartless idiot

dun care for his best fren

IN MY CLASS.

I think kan,
this gurl hypocrite la.
To the max. That one I no think. I KNOW.

I think kan, I very2345 bitchy about people I have grudge against. Sigh. Normal.

I think kan, my mum stress. I cannot tell her now.

I think I mampos already.

2008-10-07T06:20:00.000-07:00

GOSSIP MUCH.

Tsk tsk... ppl eh... (HAHA padahal I started it)
I can't stand her. Oh god, she's like a catalyst to making me explode.

Ok nvm...'-.- sighs. I am going TM to get father's present tmrw. =D Can't wait to see him Saturday. Miss him SOOO much. wonder whaaat i should get him.... now THATS a problem.

Si Ikhwan tu we already had to ask Hyder for help, now what to get my father....X.X
I hope Syafiq LUUUURVES his prezzie.

Reenactment:
Me: Happy Birthday! (he takes out present)
Him: (GAPES) A BANANA? WHAT THE HELL??
And everyone starts singing happy birthday, drowning out his cry of sorrow..

-end-

BWAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!! Oh god, I'm so eeevil. But it's a cute fluffy thing. And primates LOVE bananas! So it makes perfect sense when I told Yanti we should get him one.

He said he's gonna get us back for it. (shivers) Ooh SCARRY.

I hate WR. HATE HATE to the CORE. To the NUCLEUS. to the um, yeah...'-.- cant think of what else to say.

I

FAIL

PHYSICS

DISAPPOINTING

GP

E

MORE DISAPPOINTING BECAUSE I USED

NARAATIVE!!
NARRATIVE!! WHAT THE HEAVEN! I want to die.... whyyyy did my writing skills have to go narrative at that point? (cries)

2008-10-05T04:05:00.001-07:00

Romaji translation of this song playing: Snow Kiss

Me o tojite naito gurowin
Yobiokosu ano kioku

Kogoeru kuchibiru kande
Futari kata o yoseau

Saigo ni kimi o mita hi o
Kioku no soko ni kakushita
Mizuumi no ue aruita ano Wonderful view(I’m feeling so alive)

snow kiss
Kono mama kimi to good-bye nante
Iwanaide

Aitai
Toki ga tomaru hodo utsukushii hoshizora owow wow…

Shiroku kagayaku iki ga
Yasashiku ano ko o tsutsumu

Suimen ga koori ni kawaru
Kurayami ga oorora ni naru

Yami ga tokereba ikite yukeru no? baby
Namida misezu ni hikari no hou e arukidasu(I’m feeling so alive)

snow kiss
Kono mama tooku hanarete mo
Nakanaide

Aitai ano hi ano toki your love
Shiroi toiki no star

snow kiss
Kono mama kimi to good-bye nante
Iwanaide

Aitai
Kimochi to ka torenai kizuato
Kesanaide
Kesanaide...

Close your eyes, night growing
You’ll recall that memory

Biting our freezing lips
We snuggle our shoulders against each other’s

I hid the day when I saw you last
At the bottom of my memories

We walked on the lake; that Wonderful view(I’m feeling so alive)

snow kiss
Don’t tell me
That I’ll be saying good-bye to you like this

I want to see you
The starry sky is beautiful enough to stop time
wow wow…

The white and shiny breath
Envelopes that child gently

The surface of the water changes into ice
The darkness turns into an aurora

When the darkness dissolves, will I be able to live? baby
I’ll start walking toward the light without showing my tears(I’m feeling so alive)

snow kiss
Even if we become separated far apart like this
Please don’t cry…
I want to see you, on that day, at that time, your love
A star of white sighs

snow kiss
Don’t tell me
That I’ll be saying good-bye to you like this

I want to see you
Unremovable scars such as feelings
Please don’t erase them
Please don’t erase them…

2008-09-27T08:15:00.000-07:00

Woah. I'm so glad Promos is over.
Next mission, Aidilfitri.

First I'd like to say that GP was okay(until I realised one of my SVs was offpoint) and Literature was easy(and I fell asleep- 4got to drink coffee in the morn s***) and that Econs was half-half(at leats a better feeling than mid yrs) and Maths was ok ( except for vectors which I JUST DONT GET IT due to not enuff practice)
A/N: Even though i practised alot already until I had headaches.

Well I KNOW I could do better. But the faith in me is slowly diminishing because of the past. I'm such a loser for doing this, I know. Need to force myself, push my arse up and make sure I get better at this like I used to...

Sighhh. My mum's wedding is on the tenth of October. <3

I miss Shilah, Yas and Muhd. I remember when Muhd and I played this game where we tried to freak my other two cuzs out by switching off the lights and hiding in the cupboard holding the remote control and switiching the tv on to a no connection channel when they came in. They screamed, and promptly ran out.

There was this young Chinese writer from China on oprah who made it big because the publishers in America decided to publish her story. I felt so inspired after that that this could actually happen. ONWARD to becoming a writer!

To all Muslims out there: Selamat Berpuasa and Hari Raya.It is a magical month where a lot of things can happen and people change.

And you realise a lot of things.

Anyway what's the latest drama? Nothing much, except Yanti and me are considering the possibility of creating a Youtube account for fun. I remember in TKGs we acted out this really funny act with The six and it was about football. I was the uh, reatrded one who couldn't see the match even with her glasses on. Of course there were the makciks who prayed(HUDA and QAH) and the fanatic(SYAz) and BLONDE(YANTI- she was holding a book called The dummy's guide to football LOLOLOLOL) and yep. funny.

I miss my father.

Anyway, my stories will be updated after Hari Raya. I think it's better to start a new one. NOT again right? LOL. Sry guys.

I'm off to catch up on Dgrayman now and Naruto. Cya!

2008-08-30T08:26:00.000-07:00

Hey back. Feeling a little better but throat is sore still.
I was cleaning up my room and I found three old diaries I used to write in. God, the things I wrote back then were more creative and interesting asto what i write now.
Here's an interesting blog entry that is not personal and old friends you might know what is this.
This is a fight that happened in my class last year about the cheerleading steps. Me Fez and Syaz did some hip hop steps and Theres and XX did some too robotic cheerleader-ish steps- which of corse the class picked. If they were smarter they'd know that it'd be best to mix both- creativity and still cheer based. We won second anyway so it doesn't matter now. Oh the day of the cheerL day I let go and uh.. Therese fell and cried. D: I felt damn guilty bout it. I wasn't supposed to support her when she fell on us but some people weren't at the stadium yet and they wanted to practise it.

Anyway back to the fight. This is what I wrote:
"Next Pg. Cheer Breakout. Literally.

Therese show face talk bimbo shit(I didn't like her then and now)
Chermaine(most pissin off) Face Face FACE!!
Jasmine propanganda shit
Fez pissed off man
XX irritating to Fez

Fez: Eh now's not the time to pick fight with me man
XX: Since when I wanna pick fight? Talk bloody crap (smth like that!)
fEZ: eH-SIALAH- u can pick fight with me anytime. now u want pick fight pick fight lah!
XX: You-
FEz: I quit!
XX: Fine! I quit ALSO! Give up man.
"
End story. Another one is "
I am so dead.
Stand back, Grim Reaper!
A girl is flying your way. Bring on the coffin and chrystanthemums! I'm gonna need it. No time for tissue though. (P.S. I want my coffin to be yellow and braided (around) with lillies."

And I remember the time I told INNOCENT syaz that I liked our Malay teacher.Here's the post
"In fact I think he knows I like him... Syaz found out I like him and the first thing she said was "I like him as a father too. Wait- you like him as a father-like thing right? Not the other way round right? RIGHT?
All I said was a half whimper-half laughter. She took it as a yes. Haha! Anyway she's so innocent, I don't wanna 'pollute' her."

Anyway as I was reading back the previous posts, I realised that I grew up as a girl who doesn't like to show emotion. I used to and I think I still do think that showing emotion means that you're weak. Especially if I show emotion to my family. Now to me THAT is a big NO-NO.

Anyway take this post old friends with no offence whatsoever because that was the past. And what's left is present and future. SO DONT BE STUCK UP SNOBS, PLEASE GROW UP. (cough) No offence...

2008-08-24T21:18:00.000-07:00

Once Upon A tIme lived a lonely yellow-haired girl called Panty(Yanti+Paris). She was very sad because she had no one to play with. She had always wanted to make friends with creatures she heard living in the Extremely Scary Dangerous Unknown Forbidden Forest, but her mother banned her from going because it is "an extremely scary dangerous unknown forbidden place".
One day she decided to head out to the Extremely Scary Dangerous Unknown Forbidden Forest because she suddenly had extremely good intuition that nothing bad was ever going to happen today.
So she headed off to the forest. At first she only saw trees and trees. She walked on and saw shrubs and shrubs. Then she ran on and saw bush after bush.
She was starting to get irritated. "What the hell? What's next? SNOW?"
As soon as she said it an avalanche of snow from nowhere pummeled her to the ground.

Panty stood up and suddenly it struck her. "Hey! Everything I passed by is just like I imagined! At first I imagined trees, and after a while, I asked myself 'where's the shrubs?' and they popped out and then I... wait... I did not imagine any bushes... I only scratched my armpit..." said she, puzzled. Where the bush came from she would never know...

Anyway. back to the story.

So then suddenly she heard a sound and immediately her face brightened. Friends! she thought.
And she turned and saw a..
TBC

2008-08-15T08:04:00.000-07:00

Remember the time when we were young,
And foolish
And stupid
?
Even now
As I'm typing this
I realise that we still are
Or maybe it's just me
And it was never meant to be

Confusing things lead to pain and regret.
I try and try but I can't forget.
What makes it worse is that this girl here
She's not me
Nope not me
She's someone else I don't wanna know
She's a very... lonely person.
And she has realised that
Two years is too much to wait
Just to start a new life

So what is next, lil man?
Me laughing and entertaining myself
And you just you..

And a lot of things inbetween.

2008-08-10T08:23:00.000-07:00

It is amazing how one can declare "Hey We're best friends forevA!!" and then do contradicting things. SO therefore in return I shall not do anything anymore. I am tired of this and ample advice and evidence tells me it is not worth my time. Instinct is also an important elemnt in playing a prt in my decision, and since others have also done the same, I will do it as well.

Anyway I was at Port Dickson for 3 days. Just came back tonyt. There I watched this inspirational show Fly Away Hoe. CHeck it out, the main star is Anne Marie Paquin, My favorite X Men character here. Shes pretty =DD

You know what the saddest part is? There is no Gambit in Xmen. Damnit la. Stupid Iceman idiot. The chemistry would have been much more with this guy who would have called her, in his trademark French accent, 'cheri'.
Drooool.
Btw Ive heard many ppl want Taylor Kitsch to play him. Did I spell that ryt and why does he sound so familiar?

Just like Gambit and Rogue who would never get together, It's again the same thing with the broody Sasuke and Sakura with her neglected heart.
Sigh.

He looks so hot here. Droool.

Anyway real stuff. So my family went to Carousel on monday. CHOCO FOUNTAIN!! WOOOOOT. But its dark chocolate and i dont really like. but who cares its alot of munni so i eat. =D

Anyway we stayed at Port Dickson AVILLION hotel. I'd like to advertise bt it.
Clears throat: Avillion boasts to be one of the unique 5 star hotels in Msia where they PRESERVE nature, and the very place resident guests live in is surrounded with it. There are 3 pools and a FARM. with rabbits and chickens and peacocoks and doves! and terapins! SO COOL RYT? I GET TO CARRY two baby rabbits. (Awww...) they were so soft and cuddly.
And a dove shit on my hand the 2nd day... Not the first time.
We get to feed them daily at ten.
The Kids Cabin has PS2s, 4 of em. My sis does sandart there at nyt while i hog the ps2 haha. (see the diff?)

Anyway that's all I can talk abt now. Oh the spa is good. The Malay traditional massage, I fell asleep halfway. Heh.
Tiq's Bday cake to me =D. <3

2008-08-07T06:55:00.000-07:00

What hath not killed yet hath made one stronger.

2008-08-06T05:27:00.000-07:00

Tattered wings and broken bones,

Bruised by words and bruised by stones

Flying to wherever she can escape,

Held together by hope and tape

Hiding in fear and hiding in shame,

Carrying their judgment and carrying the blame

Pulled from her freedom and pulled from her sky,

Pushed over the edge to see if she could fly

Ripped from her happiness and ripped of her wings,

Loved by nothing and afraid of everything

Pushed further without knowing how to fly,

Down falls the wingless angel rejected from her sky.

2008-08-06T05:21:00.000-07:00

2008-08-04T02:07:00.001-07:00

2008-07-29T06:37:00.000-07:00

Down, down, down, down.

:(:(:(:(:(:(

2008-07-24T23:13:00.000-07:00

Sunday... my last chance at something that could be so special.

2008-07-23T05:42:00.000-07:00

Brief summary of what happened today:
School
Went for the sajak competition at innova
started idiotically late(janji melayu kan)
great competitors
my favourite was the millenia guy about the sun and moon cos he's funny and erm cute
fadhilah was the epitome of grace
natasha and rika were as lifeless as salji hitam( black snow)
innova people were friendly and hospitable and DAMN FUNNY esp bawang putih bawang merah ppl(HHAHAHAHA)
we sang birthday song to whatshisname the bahas guy
i had BROWNIES
the Haji Suratman(or postman) was so cute like my datuk!! AWWWW!!
When atiqah was saying shed get him first, i shouted "Hes MINE!!" causing ppl to look at me and think the other way.
missed my mummies' call again. but this time did not cry =)
===i miss your reassuring voice, nagging or yelling, it still soothes my soul nonetheless ====<3

here's my newly-inspired story from my dream i had last night(it was mainly romance-themed)
btw it's not really like my other stories, it's confusing if you read.

Whenever I see him, my heart skips a beat.
Thud, thud... ....
Take me away. Not just my breath nor my soul, nor my body but every part.
Don't you dare leave a part of me behind.

"I'll never let you go."

Remember your words?
So carelessly spoken, what was left unspoken drifted off into the wind.
And now I've found him.
One is not like the other.
You, my fingers desperately trying to cling onto sand.
Him, my hands landing upon solid ground that will never break.
Maybe you're like the pocket in my skirt.
One day it will tear...eventually, and all my secrets will pour out. My feelings.
And maybe he's like the ground that stops them from falling.

You left me.
I have the liberty to speak now.
With you, I am restrained. When you left, I realised.
Your love was like a cut that kept getting deeper and deeper, one that will never heal.
His is like,
like,
a pocket full of sunshine.

Oh God. Take me away...

====when i see him for the first time, all i could say was 'enthralled'====

2008-07-22T08:17:00.000-07:00

GP test

PREJUDICE from a teacher who loves to assume our character as how we appear to HIM

judy's phone

my mummy

stupid phone

yanti and my psps

sweet lynnette

lovable camilia

syafiq the forgiver

innocent phyllis

calculative amirah

loneliness

tears and whirlwind of emotions

homework

waking up at 730 on WED

Xzostshun

emotionally and physically

pengpeng sucks at word game with "NO" and "BILATER-AL"

refreshing after-school activity

wida the compromising and lifesaver

fad the stressed and determined

sarah the angelic musical extraordinaire

shafie the epitome of what her mum is like

natasha the crying baby

rika the emo ass

home sweet 2nd home

loneliness and the prolonged silence

for havent heard my mother's voice in days...

28 Weeks Later 5/5 stars

2008-07-19T01:31:00.001-07:00

After watching this incredible movie, I've decided it needs promoting. I've watched half of it two weeks ago and only now managed to watch this 2 hr show fully at my father's place.
This show is not your typical Rob Zombie show( if that is his name). It's not filled with horror and annoying sudden loud music. Heck, even the music is so good I placed it on my blog!

So what's so different about this? God, there IS no similarity to other movies and the plot is so well-crafted and totally realistic. Seriously, it makes you tether at the edge of your seat sometimes but the best thing thats awes you is how realistic is and makes you wonder if there is such an outbreak of virus, THIS may be the reality.

So the story starts with the scene of a group of survivors hiding in a cottage having dinner. The story focuses mainly on a couple, Alice and Don. An uninfected boy arrives, bringing along some unwanted company chasing after him and discovering their hideout. In the midst of escaping, Alice and the boy gets separated and she tries to find him even though THEY were already at the door.

Don leaves the house with her screaming for him to come to his aid, running away without her.

At this point you may be wondering how is this random couple related to the story.
This is where it begins.

28 weeks later two children return to the safe (and extremely-well guarded by the US military, may I add) part of London, safe and sound after their school trip, obviously heard of the traumatic news that their mother is gone. They undergo a checkup with this doctor, a main character, who comments about the son's unique eyes, Andy's, one green and the other brown, inherited from his mother.

Take a guess what that scene is all about.

The city is across the London river and free of infection. The children learn that their father runs the place and they live in a penthouse.(top floor of a building)
"I saw her die. She was gone." He relates to them his story.

That night Andy has a bad dream. "I'm afraid I won't remember what Mom looks like anymore," he whispers to Tammy at night.

Next day they are off. Oh no, they're not running away. They'd gone back to their old house to get some of their stuff. More importantly, a picture of mum.

BEST part is, they get back what they thought was lost to them.

Their Mum, alive and breathing, still human.

"You said you saw MUM DIE!" Tammy was screaming inside the room which they were made to wait in much later back at the city. Her dad of course, was trying to cover up his lie.

He was at a loss when he saw her lying on the bed, alone and quiet.
"Forgive me Alice. I was scared," he wept.
What a bastard. Of course he got a taste of his medicine. Literally, when he kissed her. He got infected.
Unfortunately the doctor had just about come to discovering that she was a carrier of the virus despite her not showing any symptoms and seemingly immune.
"Her blood could contain a vaccine, even a cure!" she protested against the head of the military.
"You can run tests on her dead corpse, Major." he replied.

The virus has spread. Again.

Step One: Shoot target.

If it is spreading,

Step Two: Containment unit.

If it gets out of control...
Step 3: Execute Code Red. Kill and exterminate all.

Watch it to see the ending! It is a show worth your time, TRUST ME!

They play the soldiers, Andy, Don(their father in the story) and Tammy.
(from left to right)

2008-07-14T05:01:00.000-07:00

Disappointment seeps in.

I weep of shame and self-disgust.

Previous thought that once consumed my mind were know gone, full and satisfied.

T'is a heavy one, I were permitted to say.

Its weight lingering on my every breath, my eyes and heart. My mouth.

And now what is left of me is ashes and dust, specks fluttering in the wind.

And the pain that may never leave at all.

Hey it's a good Monday... okaylah. So I'm just a tad exhausted because I only had three hours of sleep yesterday. It's a wonder how I managed to stay myself today. Hm.

By the way VANILLA. What is your blog? Seriously, there is no link. Tag again yeah!

====Will you try to make me feel better.====Stick with me through whatever, or run away...

2008-07-11T08:15:00.000-07:00

==You make me love you.==
Wow. Today was a tiring day… Emotionally and physically, with the MCS’s wobbly knees. Haha. And Syafiq somehow knew the reason of why I went to school. Maybe half of it.
Anyway I’m too tired to explain. Tomorrow there’s Lit and I gotta stop thinking. But my darling friend Syaz has inspired me to write a short story. Romance. So guys go screw yourselves. Unless you’re gay or –cough- bi. Or you just like this kind of thing…
Here it goes dearies… I’m sure every girl dreams of having to go to a real ball and meeting her other half there ;).
=================Spinning=================
The pale doe-eyed girl looked at her own reflection curiously, one finger subconsciously twirling a lock of her brown hair. Was this how they’d see her? What will they think? Will they think she was just another plain half-grown woman, too wide-eyed, innocent and frail, too boring and naïve?
That was what she’d figured. That even amidst the lovely pale blue satin, her golden brown locks, her hazel eyes, and her entrancing smile, he’d see her that way. He, the prince she met a long time ago.
When she was four, she met him. He had the most handsomest smile she had ever seen. When he spoke, it was more than melody to her ears. Such grace, such charm. And she remembered when she served him his breakfast every morning, how he would reply with a gracious nod and a smile. And he would ask her to sit and talk to him. As if he were nothing but just an ordinary boy. And she would, telling him what minor things happened each day, and uncanny events that happens under the servants’ roof. That was how friendship was created.
That was thirteen years ago. She had long been out of the castle since she was eight. Four years. Would she still remember him the way she did the same about him?
Did he remember his parting words to her? She’d never forget…
Rose feels her heart in her chest beating harder than usual as the huge doors opened before her. Her name being called, her descending the very walkway she used to descend nine years ago. Her hair comes down in wavy locks framing her pale face. Her lips part to calm her breathing. Her hand caresses the bar at the side ever so slightly as she took step by step.
There is a man waiting below with his mask on, his eyes deep dark and sensual. He reaches for her and she accepts her first offer to dance, at the same time looking for him. As they dance, she feels his unusual amount of warmth emanating from his body, calming her. She feels his breath tingle her ear and shudders involuntarily, not unpleasantly.
And she hears it.
I’ve been waiting for you…
In words, the very same amused tone, yet with a huskier voice.
It was him.
And she opens her mouth to say that she had been waiting for him too.

And that’s it. Short and sweet. I know my way of writing is weird. Maybe that’s why my GP marks sucked, other than going off point I guess. Ciao and TAG!

2008-07-04T04:06:00.000-07:00

I shall start with a normal blog post.

....

HAHAHAHHAHA!!! SINCE WHEN HAVE MY POSTS EVER BEEN NORMAL?!?!
Anyway BTB. Back to business.
I failed Physics, Maths, Economics, GP....basically everything now that I think about it. That's what I supposed since some people pushing me to do better.

I.Am.SO.Gonna.Dance.For.TEACHERS.Day.
I.Dont.Care.

Anyway what else did I want to say? Oh nothing much really. So ciao! 403 has been pushing me for another story, so I shall have to make one. TT

===The secret embedded deep within the soul of its container is bursting to get out. Out, Out!==

2008-06-27T07:50:00.001-07:00

Of the Colour Black:
I watch the sun running across the sky.
I see the moon creeps up ever so slowly.
The day fades to black with deadly glitters in the air.
The trees suddenly go still; I hear myself breathe.
Red, yellow, blue and white.
In the prolonged darkness I wait
Believe that soon there will be light.
Soon I believe, I never stop, no.
The darkness fades to dull grey.
From the clutches of a demon into the clutches of hell,
Light myself on fire,
Struck by wanton lust and deep desire,
Oh how will you help me so?
I watch grey fade to yellow
Looking on, I see a familiar sight.
Night seeps away and colours rush back in.
The birds start chirping, I hear myself laughing.